- Before it Rings Again…
- Q&A: Discussion at the Time of Proposal
- Faqihul Ummah: True Love for Rasulullah (S.A.W.)
- Qaumah & Jalsa
Much effort was made over the centuries to mislead people into believing the misconception that Islam was spread with the sword. However any student of history knows very well that the “sword” that spread Islam was a “sword” that did not pierce skin, slice through flesh or sever any limbs. Rather it was the “sword” that struck the hearts and souls. It was the “sword” of akhlaaq (good character). Rasulullah (sallallahu alaihi wasallam) was blessed with the most excellent character. This powerful magnet drew the people to him and even his enemies fell meekly at his feet.
Rasulullah (sallallahu alaihi wasallam) himself practically displayed the best character in every aspect of life. Likewise he exhorted the Ummah to also adopt good akhlaaq. Hence he would repeatedly say: “The best amongst you is the one who has the best character (Sahih Bukhari).” In another Hadith Rasulullah (sallallahu alaihi wasallam) is reported to have said: “There will be nothing more weightier in the scales of a Believer on the day of Judgement than good character, and verily Allah Ta’ala detests a vulgar and foul-mouthed person (Tirmizi).”
In a similar narration Hazrath Abu Hurairah (R.A.) reports that Rasulullah (sallallahu alaihi wasallam) was once asked as to what will enter people most in Jannah? Rasulullah (sallallahu alaihi wasallam) replied: “The fear of Allah and good character.” He was also asked about what will enter people most into Jahannum. He replied: “The mouth and the private parts (i.e. the misuse of these organs) (Tirmizi).”
MOST PERFECT IMAAN
Good character is strongly bonded with Imaan. This is clearly understood from the Hadith reported by Tirmizi that: “The Believer with the most perfect Imaan is the one who has the best akhlaaq, and the best among you is the one who is best to his wife.” The same message is gleaned from the words of Rasulullah (sallallahu alaihi wasallam) wherein he stated: “Verily by means of his good character a Believer attains the ranks of those who spend their days fasting and their nights standing in prayer (Abu Dawood).”
Having understood the excellence of good character, some may wonder what is really “good character” in terms of Deen. “Akhlaaq” is a comprehensive code of conduct encompassing all aspects of life for example, how should one conduct the matters that pertain to him and Allah Ta’ala, how should he behave with his family, how should he conduct himself in business or in social life … the correct akhlaaq are to be adopted in all these spheres of life. However, the bottom line of akhlaaq is that no person must be unjustly inconvenienced in any way. Rather, as far as possible suppress one’s own rights, overlook the faults of others and be kind and good to them. Luqman (A.S.) gave the following advice to his son: “Never remember two things – Firstly, the favours that you have done for others. Secondly, the harm that others have done to you.” This is the gist of akhlaaq.
AKHLAAQ IN TRADE
It is therefore indeed tragic that by-and-large we have forgotten the akhlaaq taught by Rasulullah (sallallahu alaihi wasallam). As a result our unity and brotherhood is in shreds. Instead of adopting the akhlaaq that touched the hearts, we have generally adopted the attitude of “I must have the best — even if it be at the expense of the rest.” There was a time when a few Muslim traders migrated to Indonesia. Their akhlaaq in trade was such that in a short time the people they traded with were won over to Islam. Eventually the entire country flocked to the Deen of Allah. Now we live in times when to a large extent lack of basic ethics and even blatant fraud is distancing people from Deen. Poor akhlaaq with employees has made them wary about Muslims in general. Bad character is even pushing away those weak in Imaan into the arms of the enemies of Islam.
It is time that we educated ourselves about the correct akhlaaq. Seek the advice of authentic Ulama. Join the company of those who have learnt akhlaaq. Read about the lives of the pious elders and about their excellent akhlaaq and implement the same. Things surely do not happen overnight. But we must start walking in that direction now before it is too late.
It is imperative that we adopt the correct akhlaaq immediately. One of the great auliya of latter times has correctly stated: “Nobody will enter Jannah on the basis of his Ibaadat since we cannot perform any action perfectly enough to be regarded as worthy of presenting in the court of Allah Ta’ala. (Despite this the Ibaadat must never be neglected since Allah Ta’ala, of His grace will absolve us of the obligation if we try to perform it as best we can). However, overlooking some person’s fault, forgiving somebody, etc. — these are actions upon which we can hope for the mercy of Allah Ta’ala.”
A simple prescription for rectifying akhlaaq is to adopt the advice of Hakimul Ummah (R.A.). He states: “Before doing or saying anything … THINK: Will this word or action cause any inconvenience to anybody?” For instance a perfect thing to ponder about daily in our case would be: “How have a I parked my car in the Musjid parking?” Likewise think: “Am I disturbing anybody by talking aloud at this late hour of the night? Am I hurting somebody’s feelings in any way?…etc.” By making a habit of thinking first in this manner, we would become conscious of refraining from any such action and deed that may inconvenience others.
May Allah Ta’ala adorn us with the akhlaaq of Rasulullah (sallallahu alaihi wasallam) and make us true ambassadors of Deen. Aameen.
Before it Rings Again…
This is a true incident witnessed first hand.
The city it occurred in: Madinatul Munawwara
The place: Musjidun Nabawi (may countless blessings and salutations be showered upon the blessed personality that rests therein).
The exact location: A few metres away from the Rowdah Mubarak (the blessed resting place of Rasulullah sallallahu alaihi wasallam).
The incident: … A cellphone rang … (Allah Ta’ala save us) … and music was being played where salaams should be offered!!! Some may wonder: Is this so serious? Is it really something to report? Something to make an issue about? Does it even warrant a mention?
DESTROY MUSICAL INSTRUMENTS
Yes indeed! Every Believer’s heart will be wrenched out when he hears music ringing at the feet of the Personality (sallallahu alaihi wasallam) who declared: “I have been sent to DESTROY musical instruments” (Nailul Awtaar). The hearts of the true lovers of Rasulullah (sallallahu alaihi wasallam) will be shattered when music rings out within earshot of the Rowdah Mubarak, especially when they consider the following Hadith: “Nafi reports that Ibn Umar (R.A.) heard the sound of a shepherds flute. He thrust his fingers into his ears and moved off the road. He then kept on asking: “Can you still hear it O Nafi?” (Nafi was still a little boy at that time). I would say: “Yes.” He continued moving ahead until I informed him that I could no longer hear the sound. Ibn Umar (R.A.) then said: “I once observed Rasulullah (sallallahu alaihi wasallam) doing exactly what I had done when He heard the music of a shepherds flute (Abu Dawood).”
Rasulullah (sallallahu alaihi wasallam) set the example by shutting his ears to music. The enemies of Rasulullah (sallallahu alaihi wasallam) have set the example of playing music everywhere — in their homes, businesses, cars, on the phone, in their places of worship, etc. The Glorious Qur’an declares: “In the Rasul of Allah is a splendid example for you.” O followers of Rasulullah (sallallahu alaihi wasallam)! Which example do you choose? On which side of the music fence are you sitting?
Rasulullah (sallallahu alaihi wasallam) is reported to have said: “The Ambiya (A.S.) are informed of the actions of their followers. Consider what is being reported about us? Are we a source of happiness to Rasulullah (sallallahu alaihi wasallam) or a source of pain and grief? Let these Ahadith ring in our ears … and our hearts … and before the phone rings again …
PLEASE SWITCH OFF THE MUSICAL TONE.
Q&A: Discussion at the Time of Proposal
My parents have taken me to see several girls (all on the same day) so that I may propose to one of them. Each time I went to see a girl I was made to sit separately with her (in some instances alone in a room although the door was open) and we asked each other many things which we felt were important to know. These conversations varied from between five minutes in some cases and upto half an hour in one instance. I have been told by a friend that such discussions are not permissible. Please advise.
You have raised several important points in your question.
1. Your parents took you to see several girls all on the same day, so that you may propose to one of them.
2. You sat separately with the girl.
3. You discussed “matters of importance” with her.
Before dealing with these aspects, bear in mind the following by way of an introduction.
There are many people who find their own “partners,” they secretly or openly communicate with each other, court and engage in many other Haraam activities. They eventually decide to get married. Some formalities, customs and traditions then follow until the Nikah finally takes place.
CONSCIOUS OF DEEN
There are others who are conscious of Deen. They refrain totally from any intermingling with non-mahrams (those with whom marriage is permissible). They uphold the laws of Hijaab. When the time comes for such people to choose a marriage partner, they are concerned that this should take place in accordance to Shariah. This article primarily addresses such people (with the fervent dua that Allah Ta’ala should make us all part of the latter group).
Firstly, the procedure that you have described, that your parents took you “to see several girls all on the same day” so that you may “propose to one of them,” is extremely inappropriate. The correct procedure is that if you have been told of a girl that may be a suitable match for you, enquire through the appropriate channels about her piety, character, personality, etc. Any woman of your family may informally see her (without mentioning anything about your intentions) and tell you what you need to know. If any of these aspects are unsatisfactory and you are disinclined, do not proceed any further. Consider somebody else. If however you find that all these aspects are satisfactory and you feel inclined towards proceeding further, you may then arrange to see her. After having seen her if you still feel inclined, perform istikhara and propose.
On the contrary if after seeing her you are disinclined, you may now consider somebody else in the same manner as mentioned above. The procedure that you have described is incorrect in the light of the Ahadith and also has many social harms. Hazrath Muhammad bin Maslama (R.A.) reports that Rasulullah (sallallahu alaihi wasallam) said: “If Allah Ta’ala has placed the inclination in the heart of a person to propose to a woman, there is no harm in seeing her” (Musnad Ahmad – Hadith 17298). It is clear from this Hadith that one should only see the girl if one is sincerely inclined to propose, otherwise not. In the manner described by you, you have gone to several places without having the least inclination of proposing to any one of them at the time of seeing them.
This practice is also painful and harmful for the girl, especially a girl who strictly adheres to the laws of hijaab and who has not ruined her natural modesty. Every now and again somebody walks in and she is paraded in front of him. This could sometimes create psychological problems. The entire town gets to know that so-and-so went to see so-and-so and did not propose. They then speculate whether “something is wrong with the girl” whereas in many instances the boy was disinclined because the girl did not conform to some of his own warped preferences, such as that she must not observe Hijaab, etc. If this goes on, even the girl may begin to wrongly feel that she perhaps is seriously lacking in something. This could lead to depression or other similar problems.
Secondly let us consider the aspect of “separate seating” and discussion of “matters of importance.” What is the purpose of this? To get to know one another? Let alone a few minutes, even an hour long discussion will not enable the boy and girl to know one another. What can they truly gauge from this conversation? Each one will put up his / her best performance and the other party could easily fall into a misconception. Indeed there often are very important points which both parties need to know before making any decision. These aspects can be acquired via family members. If the boy wishes to know something, he may enquire this via his mother, sister or any other female relative. The girl may adopt similar channels. Thus there is no need to have any discussion. To be sitting together “separately” (in some degree of privacy) is not permissible at all irrespective of what the intentions may be. Rasulullah (sallallahu alaihi wasallam) is reported to have said: “A man should never be in seclusion with a non-mahram woman for verily the third one present is Shaitaan.”
The decadent western “culture” promoted the concept of “getting to know each other” before contemplating marriage. For this they court and even live together. The rate of success in their marriages is such that one in three homes in America is a single parent home!!! Contrast that with the rate of success in the marriages conducted according to the Sunnah where in most instances, the couples first conversation only took place after Nikah. Having become influenced to some degree by the western concept of “getting to know each other” we have deemed it necessary for the boy and girl to “discuss matters of importance” before proposing marriage.
Therefore refrain from such discussions. The Sunnah has clearly permitted that you may see the girl who you feel inclined to propose to — not more.
Faqihul Ummah: True Love for Rasulullah (S.A.W.)
Summary of Letter:
Respected Mufti Saheb
السلام عليكم و رحمة الله و بركاته
How can one generate the true natural love for Rasulullah (sallallahu alaihi wasallam) within oneself?
Summary of Reply:
Once Rasulullah (sallallahu alaihi wasallam) said to him: “O my beloved son! If it is possible that you could commence the day or night in such a condition that your heart is free of malice for anyone, then do so!” (i.e. you should definitely try to acquire this). Thereafter Rasulullah (sallallahu alaihi wasallam) said: “This (keeping the heart clean of any malice) is from my Sunnah. The one who loves my Sunnah has indeed loved me. The one who loves me will be with me in Jannah.”
This clearly indicates to us how to acquire the true love of Rasulullah (sallallahu alaihi wasallam). By loving the Sunnats of Rasulullah (sallallahu alaihi wasallam) and practicing upon them one’s love for him will increase.
Qaumah & Jalsa
The standing posture after ruku before going into sajdah is termed as Qaumah whilst the sitting posture between the two sajdahs is termed as Jalsah.
It is waajib (compulsory) to perform the ruku, qaumah, sajdah and jalsah calmly. To perform these postures of Salaat calmly means that after performing the ruku for instance, one should not hasten towards the sajdah until the entire body is at ease.
Once the body is in this condition of calm and ease, to remain in that posture for the duration of one Tasbeeh (the duration of reciting subhaanallah once) is waajib. To perform these postures in the above mentioned manner (calmly) is termed as “It’minaan.” The omission of It’minaan intentionally necessitates the repetition of the entire Salaat, since a waajib has been omitted. However if the omission was unintentional, a sajdah sahw (remedial prostration) has to be made. If the sajdah sahw was not performed, the Salaat is not valid and must be repeated (Shaami Vol.1 pg.433).
Most people do perform the ruku and sajdah calmly. However, many people do not fulfil the condition of It’minaan in Qaumah and Jalsah at all, since the masnoon duas that are to be recited in these postures are completely omitted. Sadly many of the learned as well as the general public are guilty of this omission. (Salaah – Is Your’s Correct; p.12 – by Hazrath Moulana Fazlur Rahman Aazmi Saheb