The Role of a Woman in Marriage


Thursday, 16 May 2013 11:27

(Highlights of Mufti Ebrahim Salejee’s majlis - Saturday 11th May)

Nabi (sallallahu alaihi wa sallam) once explained that a woman who marries without the consent of her parents or guardians then her marriage is incorrect. Although the nikaah will not be invalid, but this is an incorrect procedure where a woman goes about arranging her own marriage. The reasons could be multiple, but one would be that it would lead to a whole host of problems. Firstly, if she is going to seek her own partner then as it is common, the boy will only show that side of himself that is appealing and she will only realise his true colours after marriage. Secondly, at times she will have to go through several men and in this way it will lead to her having an ill-reputation. Therefore, the Hadeeth advises that all these matters should be handled by the parents and family elders.

People tend to give a very narrow meaning to ‘tasawwuf’, whereas tasawwuf covers all aspects of deen. At times, Hadhratjee (rahmatullahi alaih) would even dedicate the entire majlis to discussing aspects of politics and he would say: “There is no deen which does not have politics and there is no politics which does not have deen.” However, politics does not refer to what we find nowadays. Instead, it means to apply your mind correctly in passing a judgement or making a decision.

People normally object that we all are equal in the sight of Allah Ta`ala, so why is there a difference when it comes to marriage. Why can a boy not marry any woman of his choice? The answer to this is that as far as matters pertaining to ibaadat and reward of the hereafter, there is no difference between any person. There is scope for every individual to excel the rest. However, Islam also recognises the temperament and feelings of people. Thus, in the case of nikaah, compatibility between spouses is an issue that is emphasised. This will then see to the smooth continuity of the marriage.

Duration: 45:05

Format: MP3

Size: 7.7 MB

Download Majlis mp3

(NB: Due to technical problems the recording is not of a very high quality, and a few minutes were not recorded.)